My Secret from You
by Premium-juice0
Summary: Kyle slowly realizes his growing feelings for his best friend Stan, whom unfortunately, is in a relationship with Wendy. Kyle constantly tells himself that Stan is off limits, and is just a friend, but his heart overpowers his ethics.
1. Chapter 1

Stan's P.O.V

Ah, what a great day for school today. The temperature isn't too cold, or too warm. Just right.

The guys and I walked together to the bus stop, as usual. And of course, Cartman and Kyle are

arguing over something dumb. Though somehow, I manage to tune them out. Well, I can hear

them, but not really listen, does that make sense?

"God damn it Cartman, just stop it! There's no way I'm going to-"

"Oh I see! I totally see! You're just being a pussy, like always, aren't you? Yeah, I know!"

"Oh just shut up, fatass!"

For some reason I just had a smile on my face as I watched the two argue. But really, I was focused on Kyle. He always makes me smile…

"Come on guys, let's get on the bus." I said nonchalantly, as the bus arrived. We all boarded the bus, and, as usual, Kyle and I sat next to each other, then Kenny and Cartman sat behind us.

"Oh… hey Stan. Nice day today, huh?" A familiar, smooth voice said to me. I turned to my right, and saw Wendy and Bebe sitting at the opposite side from us. I just gave her a smile.

"Yeah, it sure is."

She blushed, and then began talking and giggling with her best friend about God knows what. I turned to Kyle, _my _best friend, but only to see him looking out the window, pouty while crossing his arms.

"Hey dude, are you okay?" I asked, obviously concerned. He turned to me, with a frustrated look on his face.

"Yeah… I'm fine."

I looked to him with concern in my eyes. Fine? Fine? I don't think so!

"You sure? You know I'm here for you-"

"Yeah yeah, I know. We're best friends, right? Yeah, I get it. Just… I need to think."

I nodded, and then turned back to facing forward. I guess I can just leave him alone… he isn't mine. We eventually arrived to school; let the boring lessons begin.

Kyle's P.O.V

I know it's just Stan talking to Wendy but… I just can't help but feel so jealous! All Stan and I ever do in the morning is talk, well, not even talk, we just say hi, smile, and wave. And what, with Wendy, he actually acknowledges her? Maybe I'm just over-reacting… Wendy is Stan's girlfriend after all.

And no, I'm NOT going through menopause! Stupid Cartman….

Am I getting feelings for Stan? N-No, I can't… I've liked girls before. Bebe and I almost kissed before…

But with Stan… everything is different! Ugh, screw this; I'm just going to concentrate on my work. Yeah, great idea.

But then, a note was dropped onto my desk. I raised an eyebrow, opened it, and read the message.

_Sorry Kyle, I know I should respect your decision on leaving you alone to think, but dude, you're my best friend. What's wrong?_

Hmm, how about that I'm JUST a best friend to you? I don't know why… but with Stan…

We have told each other that we've loved each other. Then again, that time he was drunk, and spouting something about aliens and how the world wasn't really how it seemed. And he did say that he didn't know what he was saying at the time…

But… I still keep those words to heart. Except for the part where he flipped me off. Those words really touched me. What's more, he said it _twice_. That has to mean something, right?

I sighed, and then hesitantly wrote my reply.

_Yeah dude, thanks for the concern. But, it's something I can handle on my own. You don't need to help._

I passed it back to him, then he gave me an are-you-kidding me stare.

_But I want to help. Now, can you tell me what's wrong? For like, the third time?_

I bitterly chuckled to myself, and then hid the note. No Stan, I can't tell you what's wrong. It isn't you… it's me.


	2. Chapter 2

Stan's P.O.V

Seriously, what is up with Kyle today? He's been acting for upset ever since we got off that bus! I'm really starting to get worried. Despite the 15 times I asked him what was wrong; he always gave me the same, half-assed excuse. "I'm fine, you don't need to help".

But I _want_ to help. That's the thing! But now, I'm in a lunch date with Wendy. I don't know, should I be happy? I don't really feel anything…

"It's nice being with you Stan, really." Wendy cooed to me. I turned my head to her and smiled.

"That's great."

"Is there something wrong? The whole day, you seemed like you were thinking about something."

I stopped to think. Should I tell her? Well, she is my girlfriend, it makes sense to.

"Well, ever since we got off the bus, Kyle's been acting really strange lately. In fact, he just stopped smiling altogether during the bus ride here! And I'm trying to figure it out."

"Have you asked him what was wrong?"

"Yeah, for 15 times, he still says he's fine. But I don't buy it."

"Well, why don't you take his word for it?"

I raised my eyebrow at her.

"Do you know what I'm talking about?"

I thought for a moment, and then she sighed.

"What I mean is, why don't you let him think? For instance, out of all those 15 times you asked him if he was okay, have you ever thought that he could handle whatever what was bothering him on his own?"

"Y-Yeah…"

"Then maybe you should stick to that thought. Maybe he just needs some time to think. I know you two are best friends and all, but you should also respect each other's privacy. You know, alone time to yourselves?"

I smiled at her. Wow, she sure does know the right things to say.

"Yeah, you're right. Thanks Wendy."

She giggled.

"No problem."

I gave her a kiss on the cheek, then the bell rang for class. Wow, lunch went by so fast.

Cartman's P.O.V

Something is bothering this ass-hole, and it isn't me! I'm gonna get to the bottom of this…

"Kyle! Hey, Kyle!" I shouted, purposely to his ear. But, instead of talking back to me, he just focused on the ground. I looked to Kenny, and he looked to me, then I grabbed him and turned him to face me.

"What do you want Cartman."

"Dude, what is wrong with you?"

"What are you talking about? No, forget it, we're going to be late for class."

"Not until you tell us what's wrong!" Kenny muffled through his thick orange jacket.

Kyle just looked away from my eyes. I was starting to get irritated, so I let him go.

"Dude, we're trying to help you, and what, you throw us away, just like that? You know there's something wrong, and since we can see it, tell us what's wrong!"

"-sigh- you and Stan are all the same…"

"What the- You didn't even tell Stan?"

"DO I NEED TO? WHY DO I NEED TO TELL THAT ASS-HOLE ANYTHING? YOU WOULDN'T EVEN UNDERSTAND, SO STOP TRYING TO GET ME TO TALK, BECAUSE IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN!"

Kenny and I flinched at his words, and stared at him with wide eyes. He's never called Stan an ass-hole… well, except for that time when he turned 10, and he started saying everything was shit. But even then, it didn't sound as harsh as this.

Kyle stormed off, leaving people stare at him, and us as he left to our teacher's room.

"We need to tell Stan." Was all I could say.

_**Hey guys! Thanks for reading, I really appreciate it! I apologize since the chappies are so short, but do disregard that ^^; I'm trying all I can to make this seem… not rushed xD And I would appreciate some reviews also :3 Please, it would be a great help, and a great motivation!**_

_**Thank you, and thank you all for reading~**_


	3. Chapter 3

Stan's P.O.V

So Mr. Garrison is getting ready for the lesson, then out of nowhere, my friends Cartman and Kenny burst out the door.

"DUDE! STAN! WE NEED TO TALK TO YOU!" Cartman yelled, running to my desk. I just raised my eyebrow, then looked around. When I did, I didn't see Kyle.

Where could he be?

"Cartman, sit your ass down and listen to the lesson! You too, Kenny!"

Cartman and Kenny sighed, then went to their desks. I quickly wrote a note, then passed it to Cartman.

_What happened? Where's Kyle?_

_Dude, that's the thing! Before class started, Kenny and I were talking to him about why he was so down. He wouldn't tell us a damn thing! Then he stormed off!_

_Damn it… who knows where he could be?_

_He even called you an ass-hole. Are you two fighting or something?_

_I don't even know dude. I just want to look for him, and make sure that he's safe._

I looked to Cartman, then he nodded, and then I raised my hand.

"Mr. Garrison, can I go to the bathroom?"

"Yeah, me too!"

"Same here!" Kenny muffled.

"Whatever kids."

With that said, the three of us got our bathroom passes and went out of the classroom to look for Kyle. We checked every corner of the school, and he was still nowhere to be found.

"Damn it Kyle, where are you?" Cartman yelled through the halls.

"He's not here. He must be out in the playground." I said, leading the others outside.

"What the- why would he be here? It's a blizzard!" Cartman shouted as the snow whirred around us.

"We have to try!" I shouted as I shielded my eyes through the windy snow. I have to look for Kyle… I'm so worried about him…

"I think I see him!" Kenny muffled, pointing to an orange figure sitting on the swings. I looked to where he was pointing at, and I saw a green hat on top of the orange figure.

* * *

><p>"<em>Stan, do you really think my hat is stupid?"<em>

"_As a matter of fact, I think it is the nicest hat I have ever known."_

* * *

><p>"KYLE! KYLE!" I shouted, screaming at the top of my lungs, begging for his attention. I quickly made my way to him, then kept shouting his name.<p>

"KYLE!"

Once I finally got to him, I shook his body.

"Kyle, speak to me, please!"

No movement.

"Please Kyle, please! Don't die! Don't be dead, please…" I whimpered, holding him close to me. Why would he be out here? Is he trying to kill himself? What was so frustrating to him that got him to do this?

"S-S-Stan? I-Is that you?" a familiar, yet shivering voice squeaked. I pulled away, and looked deep into his eyes.

"Kyle, you scared the shit out of me! Please, don't do that again!"

I carried him through the snow, then ran back inside the building where Kenny and Cartman were. I would have ran through the snow, but there's like 2 feet of snow piled up!

"S-Stan…" Kyle's faint voice said as I laid him on the warm floor.

"Shhh Kyle, let's get you warm." I said as I took off my own jacket and wrapped him in it. He must have been freezing…

"Damn Kyle, what's wrong with you?" Cartman questioned as I held Kyle close to my body.

"Shut up Cartman, just go to class!" I shouted as I held Kyle tighter. His body is beyond cold!

"Whatever, come on Kenny, let's go."

I saw them off, then looked back to Kyle.

"Why Kyle? Why did you go off on your own like that?"

I looked softly to the small shaking body.

"I-I'm sorry Stan…"

I gave him a small smile. Why do I feel like crying? Is it because my best friend is like this? No… It's something like that, but different…

* * *

><p>Kyle's P.O.V<p>

This is like a dream or something…

First I was mad at Stan for no reason and ignored him all day. I didn't even talk to him at lunch. And yet… he was the one who saved me from my stupid actions. I just stormed off to think, then snow started falling. I decided it was just snow, then it started turning into a blizzard! Then, before I knew it, everything was covered in snow. I didn't know where to go. And then, I heard Stan's voice calling my name…

How was it that he saved me, when I completely ignored him almost the whole day?

Maybe it's because we're best friends.

Yeah, that's it. Nothing more, nothing less. Though, I want it to be a different reason. I wanted it to be something more than just an act of friendship. But, I know that day won't happen. He'll never break up with Wendy, then step up to me. He was in love with Wendy ever since the 3rd grade…

And yet, here we are. Stan, wrapping me in his jacket, and holding me tight and close. Whenever I breathed in, I could smell his scent. It's so sweet…

I must be cursed or something. Why do I have to fall in love with someone who most likely will never love me back?

* * *

><p>Wendy's P.O.V<p>

I'm starting to get worried. Stan's been gone for almost 20 minutes! He doesn't even go to the bathroom at this school! And since Cartman and Kenny are back, where could Stan be? I'm really doubting he's at the bathroom…

"Mr. Garrison, may I use the restroom?" I asked with a raised hand.

"Alright Wendy, don't forget the pass."

I took the pass, then ran out of the classroom. First place I thought of was the playground, but from looking out the window, there was a blizzard outside! Yet, I still went over there.

When I passed by the corner, I saw Stan on his knees on the floor, with Kyle laying by him. Is… Stan holding Kyle?

I hid behind the corner. Stan… he still loves me, right? He remembers that he has a girlfriend… right? Kyle is just his best friend! And besides… Stan is straight…

_Snap out of it Wendy, Stan loves you! And you love him! Kyle is just his friend!_

My brain keeps saying that, but my heart disagrees. So… I made my way back to the classroom, in tears.


	4. Chapter 4

Stan's P.O.V

I decided to skip class and escort Kyle home. No way is he leaving my sight ever again! Even… even if it takes breaking up with Wendy so that all of my attention is on Kyle. Anything so that he won't do stupid stuff like this again! He's the whole world to me. If anything bad happened to him, I would do all that I can to save him. This may sound selfish, but… I don't want him to die until I die. Before I die, the only thing I want to see is him. Is that so wrong?

"Stan, you don't have to carry me home. I-I can walk." Kyle said in a faint voice.

Yeah, when I said I was escorting Kyle home, I meant carrying him on my back. It's the only thing I can think of to keep him warm; my body heat.

"Nah, I want to carry you like this." I said nonchalantly. Though in a normal person's eyes, this would seem very wrong and intimate.

"Oh… o-okay." Kyle said back, then I felt him snuggle to my back. I smiled at the adorable action.

_Woah, wait. A-Adorable?_

I randomly started blushing. T-This isn't the first time I thought Kyle was adorable. But given the situation… why does calling him adorable feel more… intimate to me?

I then started reminiscing about what Kyle and I had together.

"_Thanks for being here Stan. You're my super best friend."_

"_You're my super best friend too, Kyle."_

"_Stan, do you really think my hat is stupid?_"

"_As a matter of fact, I think it is the nicest hat I have ever known."_

"_Kyle… I love you."_

My eyes widened when that memory came to my mind. That was the time I was diagnosed with Asperger's… or as those people called it. I remember; they made me drink something, and I became drunk. But if I was drunk… why do I remember saying that to him so clearly? Did I… mean it?

Well yeah, I love Kyle, but… do I love him more than a friend?

Hang on, I have a girlfriend for crying out loud!

Then again, we don't do much. The most that we've done during the few months of our relationship was hold hands and kiss each other in the cheek. Others think that we're such an adorable couple and all but… am I happy in this relationship? I'm doing this for Wendy's happiness but… am I happy also? Being in a relationship means that both parties have to feel mutual, right? I don't really feel anything for Wendy anymore… that spark that we used to have has no effect on me. Not anymore.

And now that I think about it, whenever I'm not with Wendy, I'm with Kyle, and with Cartman and Kenny sometimes. But mostly Kyle. He means the world to me; if anything, if I had a choice to choose between Kyle and Wendy, I'd actually choose Kyle.

I'd hate to hurt Wendy, I mean, she doesn't deserve it. She's such a nice and kind person, and smart too. But… I'm just not feeling that spark anymore. She's never in my mind as much as Kyle has.

And I don't think she's ever turned me on either. Even being in her dress at Al and Mr. Slave's wedding didn't. Even though we were still broken up at that time, I do think about it once in a while, and it still doesn't do anything.

While I was still contemplating in my mind whether I "like like" Kyle or not, it took me a while to realize we were at the front of Kyle's house until Kyle told me. In his sweet, blissful voice.

"Hey Stan, we're here now. C-Can you put me down?"

"Sure Kyle."

I set him down carefully, then opened the door with the spare key he gave me, then gestured for him to come in like a gentleman.

"Thanks for lending me your jacket, Stan. It really keeps me warm."

I smiled at him.

"No problem Kyle."

We both sat on the couch and decided to watch TV.

"Hey, where's your parents?"

"They're at a vacation with each other, so it's just me and Ike around here."

"What do you do for food?"

"Mom and Dad left us enough money for take-out that'll last a month, I think we're good."

"Wanna order some pizza?"

"Sure!"

I just wanted to keep talking to here his sweet voice. It sounds so much like music to me.

"Hello? Yes, I'd like one medium order of pepperoni pizza please." Kyle said on the phone. I just stared at him with a smile on my face as he placed the order.

"Thanks. Bye."

As he hanged up the phone, I still stared at him like an idiot. What is wrong with me?

"The pizza's getting here in 30 minutes."

"Cool."

We sat in silence as we watched whatever was on TV.

"Hey Kyle, can I tell you something?"

"Uh, sure dude."

"I'm going to break up with Wendy."

Kyle looked to me with widened eyes.

"Yeah… I'm serious."

* * *

><p>Kyle's P.O.V<p>

Here we were, sitting on my couch watching TV, then Stan tells me he's breaking up with Wendy?

…

..

This has got to be a dream.

"Dude, you've like here since 3rd-"

"Yeah, I know. But… something... No, some_one_ changed my mind about her. And now, I don't feel anything for her anymore."

I thought for a bit. Could he be talking about me?

No, he's probably talking about some other girl.

"Are you… thinking about another girl or something?"

Stan nodded.

"No, I'm thinking about someone closer than you think."

I started thinking. Who could he possibly like that isn't a girl at school?

* * *

><p><strong>Hey guys, here is chapter 4! I'd really appreciate it if you guys reviewed, so I'll know whether or not if this story is going well. To me, I think it's going great! But your opinions mean the most to me, so please don't hesitate to review ^^ And I do apologize for updating late! I hope you enjoyed reading this chappie!<strong>


End file.
